5 months ago
Sunday, May 16, 2010
The Case of the Missing Case
A Posting from Linda:
I have a label maker, so obviously, I'm very organized. Okay, I have a label maker and I actually use it, so I'm organized. I have a label maker, I use it and I put things back where they belong or else my entire world falls apart and I get into the fetal position and start sucking my thumb; organization is more than just a life skill for me - - it's part and parcel to my survival. My spices are alphabetized. All my hangers face in the same direction, with the clothes separated by type. My lists have lists.
So where is my thread case, I'd like to know! Naturally, it's not my only thread case. I have at least four containers of various threads organized by 1) color, 2) use, 3) manufacturer, 4) opened. Doesn't everybody do this?
So what happened to the plastic bin with thread, that also contains a couple of great cutters and a few notions? It's SUPPOSED to be right next to it's pal, but IT'S NOT THERE!
I discovered this last night when Philip called me from Joann Fabrics (I should have known the world was ending right then).
Philip: You'll never guess where I am.
Me: Okay. Then I won't.
Philip: I'm at Joann's.
Me: Joann who?
Philip: Joann Fabrics.
Me: You're at Joann Fabrics.
Philip: Yep, and I'm here because.....
Me: You're getting me a gift certificate!!
(Leanne laughing in the background)
Philip: Um, no. Let me explain what's happening.
Me: Your car broke down and you need me to pick you and Leanne up? Don't worry - - I'll be right there.
Philip: NO! MOM! Just listen. I just need your advice and I need to explain this to you.
Me: You need my advice about something from Joann Fabrics? (I'm certain delirium is setting in since I've had food poisoning for 48 hours. Ahhh, nature's cruel sense of humor. How many times have I wished for my heterosexual offspring to call me from a fabric store and ask my advice. And now I must be having auditory hallucinations.)
Philip: Yes, I need your advice about what thread to buy.
Me: You need my advice about what thread to buy at Joann's.
Philip: Mom, you have to stop repeating everything. Will you let me explain what's going on?
Me: Sure. Who's stopping you?
(Leanne still giggling in the background.)
Philip: Kate's birthday is coming up and she's throwing a combined party for herself, Josh and another person whose birthday falls right around that date. And Kate being Kate, she's decided on a themed costume party.
Me: Oh boy. (Said as in the 'oh boy are we in trouble' tone of voice.)
Philip: Yeah, and you know I hate that kind of thing but it's for Kate and Josh so if I'm going to do this I want to do it right. And I have the four yards of fabric that I need, I just need to know do I buy a large spool of thread or a small one?
Me: (Isn't that the cutest thing. He thinks thread type depends upon what size the spool is.) Philip, I have any color and type of thread you need. Just bring your fabric home and we'll find the right thing.
Philip: I don't know. It's a pretty strange color and there's only one thread here that comes close.
Me: (Oh my goodness I couldn't love this precious boy any more than I do!) Honey, it's okay. Joann's is five minutes away, but I bet I have whatever you need. Besides the seams will be on the inside anyway.
Philip: I don't even know what that means. But you can explain it to me when you teach me how to sew on your machine.
Me: (Can you believe the nerve of this kid - - thinking he's going to touch MY friend?) You, Mr. Fidget, are not touching my $1200 sewing machine.
Philip: Well, I didn't want to make you feel like you have to do this. It's my project.
Me: (Dear Lord, it's the science fair all over again.) Just bring your material home, honey.
Philip: Mom, I know you've been sick with the food poisoning, but Leanne and I are stopping at Wendy's. Do you want me to pick anything up for you?
Me: (What a lovely young man. So thoughtful and sweet.) Thanks honey, but I don't feel up to eating anything yet.
Philip: Not even a Frosty?
Me: (What, is he Satan? Tempting me with a Frosty when I can barely visualize one without having to run to the bathroom? Whose kid is this anyway?) No, sweetheart, but thanks.
About 15 minutes later they arrive home, finish eating, and join me upstairs for some creative input.
Philip is so excited to show off his purchases. And I can't explain it all here just on the one in 8 billion chance that one of his friends might be kidnapped and forced to read this posting. Suffice to say, he has a cool costume idea. And as soon as I saw his fabric I knew that I had thread to match.
We went into the sewing room and I grabbed ...WAIT! Only one of my side-by-side containers of thread? I open up the one I have, immediately produce the proper color ("Wow!" says Philip. "That's a better match than what we found at the store.") but start hyperventilating about my lost case.
I simply can't fathom where it is. I look under the bed and under other containers. Philip wonders if I took it downstairs at some point to do some mending. I start questioning whether I took it with me on vacation. All negatives. I simply do not lose things like this. I'm ready to put out an APB. Maybe Maggie could do a search and rescue.
The only scenario that makes sense to me is that a marauding band of home invaders entered our house and couldn't find anything worthwhile to take until they got to the sewing room.
"Dude, that's Aurifil's China Beige!"
"I see some Sedona Rust, too. And some Bottom Line."
"Man, I need me some Bottom Line, if you know what I'm saying."
And off they went. I realized if nothing else, it would make a good story for you. So I gathered some spools from my other spots to create the picture for the top of this post. What to set the spools on for a cute picture though? The little quilt I keep in the sewing room to cover my machine. Which was on the floor next to my machine.
I lifted up the quilt to find this. Right where I'd left it. My missing case of thread, cutters and notions. Right next to it's buddy. While I was getting ready for vacation I pulled some things together at the last minute and rushed out the door. I've been using my machine faithfully, but left the quilt where it lay on the floor.
My world is all sorted out again. I don't even wanna know the street value of my large spools of variegated King Tut.